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Dealing With Painful Thanksgiving Memories

This morning while preparing a cake to take to my godmother’s house for Thanksgiving dinner, I started to feel sad. Noticing my mood change, I sat down to journal and explore my emotions to figure out what was going on. As I journaled I saw that memories started to surface from my childhood. I thought about the house I grew up in and how much fun we had during the holidays. We would eat, dance, laugh, and just enjoy each other. Since then, my mom has moved out of that house and remarried, so those times are long gone. I also thought about the years in my marriage where I spent Thanksgiving alone, due to my ex-husband suddenly needing to go back to his hometown by himself. I remember the rejection, abandonment, and loneliness I felt during those times.

So all of those memories created feelings of sadness. I allowed myself to get out how I felt and then I began to pray. I took my good and painful memories to God and asked Him for comfort. After praying, God reminded me of how He’s delivered me and that I needed to start creating new memories. Although I can’t be home with my family for Thanksgiving, I have extended family that I can celebrate with. I also felt thankful that I have peace and no longer have to experience any more painful memories from an unhealthy marriage and can continue to celebrate new beginnings and a fresh start. Now my sad feelings have subsided and I’m looking forward to having a great Thanksgiving holiday filled with new memories.

I share my truth with you today to let you know that if you have moments of sadness today, you’re not alone. It’s normal to have triggers that remind you of the past, but the key is dealing with them in a healthy way so that your past doesn’t ruin your present and future. The worse thing you could do is ignore how you feel and act like your sadness or pain doesn’t exist. That will only lead to unhealthy expressions of your emotions (i.e. anger, lashing out at others, isolating yourself, reaching out to someone you don’t need to be contacting, etc). Instead of ignoring your emotions, take a moment and allow yourself to feel. Express to God or a loved one how you feel and then pray for God to fill you with comfort, strength, and peace so you can enjoy your day. Take this day as an opportunity to create new, happy, and joyous memories. You have so much to be thankful for. Choose to live!

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